He Loves to Listen, When You Talk.

When a partner who feels withdrawn or not willing to show love, either through communication or in a physical phase, usually leaves the other feeling unfulfilled and vastly insecure.

Sometimes people are not comfortable with someone and wait for the perfect moment to expose themselves – delay in showing their flaws. That is exactly the point where things start going downhill.

There is a fine line in being shy and being a bad communicator, and when someone cannot communicate or cannot push himself or herself to from the very beginning. I wonder what other base can there be for a good healthy relationship. There isn’t no other way to cultivate a true relationship.

Most conversations turn into arguments and remain unresolved. A block in the relationship exists or will grow when communication lines are just flat out avoided.

It is often seen that some people grew up with a notion of not upsetting the other individual, but that only pushes that person to avoid communicating his or her thoughts and feelings on sensitive topics.

Further, this behavior only ensures that important issue that needs to be resolved ASAP – puts the person in a rut. A rut so deep that it makes the individual feel like trapped on a hamster wheel, spinning in crazy circles.

Many couples stop communicating with each other because one of them is so busy doing his own thing in life, whether its school, work, hobbies, activities among other stuff. Usually everything runs on a tight schedule – making it hard to find time to talk to each other about stuff that really matters.

Or sometimes, when two people are no longer in love, it is most likely that they are together for the sake of it.

Problems and arguments are common, but it should not affect the communication between the two.

Sometimes the couple stops communicating because of the fear of upsetting each other; the woman might stop talking to her man about something because he got upset in the past when she opened the subject with him.

Differences between two people come up because the do not accept each other’s opinions and argue about something, which one feels is absurd to one and may have utmost importance to the other.

Conflict exists in all relationships and when communicating is difficult or impossible conflicts always go unresolved. Negative communication – inconsistent tone or body language leads the conflict to escalate.

People are taken by the “I” statements, focusing on the problem instead of the other person and indulge in interrupting or blaming each other.

Ladies, we love to talk. We love to resolve problems only if a problem exists.

Yes, we are slow (in fact really bad) with hints. So please communicate and tell us what is bothering you so much, that you forget that you are supposed to be happy in a relationship with the same guy who gave you crazy butterflies.

Communication helps and leads to a successful relationship. If you won’t talk about what makes you insecure or ‘crazier than usual’ , things would never go the way you had planned it.

A lack of communication leads to consistent negativity in interactions. This makes it really difficult to move towards a more effective communication style.

Instead of sending a message or text on Whatsapp, which would make things more complicated, it’s better if you meet up for coffee or some food to discuss the issue that drives you insane.

Stop, jumping to conclusions, may be he never meant what you interpreted. He was probably trying to say something else, but failed to communicate properly as he was too concerned about not hurting your feelings, Alas.

Take a step back and ask what he or she meant by that particular statement. You will clear up misunderstandings, as well as learn to better understand each other.

You should listen to try to understand, rather than focusing on how you want to respond (bombard) to oppose to what he is trying to say.

Listening to your partner is the key to clearing up the misunderstandings that are controlling your anger. Listening is one of the most important skills in developing and maintaining a sound relationship.

Remind yourself that he is not your enemy. You are a team – resolve it. A simple change in perspective can help you better understand each other and work towards a new phase.

Speak up if you want to feel heard and validated. Figure out your feelings and express CALMLY and listen intently to your man. (Men have feelings too)

You may be reacting to your own interpretation and expectations – if you apply that meaning to their actions, you do it on your own.

Clear communication will help bring more understanding, respect and clarity in your relationship. Which would allow real emotion of love to grow and make your relationship much more than just dinners and drinks.

Enjoy the moments, create memories.

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